Overload
by Sketchboy22
Summary: A human is brought to Equestria by Discord to watch over his daughters- how will he cope?
1. Cotton Candy and Chaos

Cotton Candy and Chaos

I groaned as I pushed against the grass underneath me

"Ooohh, what happened last night?"  
"I could ask you the same thing-" A voice said  
"Who are you?" I asked, opening my eyes  
"I am known by many, many, many names-"  
'Oh great, one of those...'  
"-but you may call me Discord"

I looked up and saw a chimera, I'm not kidding, an actual chimera

"Is any of this real?"  
"Depends on what your definition of 'real' is" He said cryptically  
"So let's say for the sake of my sanity that all of this is real, why am I here?"  
"I brought you here"  
"I figured as much, but why?"  
"It's simple really..."  
"Care to elaborate?"  
"I could, but where's the fun in that?"  
"Um, absolutely nothing?" I offered  
"Nope!"  
"Oooookkkkkaaaaayyyyy, where are we?"  
"Somewhere outside the Everfree I assume"

Some pink clouds floated overhead

"Why are we here?"  
"Excellent point!" He snapped his claw (talon?) and both of us reappeared in a living room

I fell to my hands and knees

"Whoops, I don't think I took into account your temporary resistance to magic"

Before I knew it, I passed out again

X

"-and I don't need someone to watch us!" A female voice said, she sounded about my age...

"Do you think you and your sister could stand each other long enough to cooperate?"  
The female voice didn't reply  
'What happened? Oh that's right-'  
"Ah, it looks like our guest is waking now"  
I sat up and rubbed my eyes, I realized I was laying on a couch with a black and white checker pattern

"My aching head..."

I looked around the room and saw Disord and another draconequus who I assumed to be the owner of the voice I heard just moments before  
"Can you explain why I'm here now?" I asked  
He cleared his throat and sent the other chimera off to another part of the house, with a huff she left

"I'll bet you're curious as to why I've taken a special interest in you"  
"Yeah, I've been wondering about that-"  
"The short answer is I threw Equestria into chaos and Sparkly and the other Elements are going to encase me in stone again in a short while"  
"Elements? Stone?"  
"I'll elaborate on that later"  
"But-"  
"Right now I need you to watch Eris and Screwball"  
"Who?"  
"My daughters"  
"I kinda figured that out, but why do you need me to watch them?"  
"Did you not just hear what I said?" He said, irritated  
"Oh, right, continue-"  
"Thank you, now as I was saying I'll be gone for, shall we say, an unknown amount of time"  
"So you want me to be a babysitter?"  
"Basically, more like a caretaker"  
"I don't know, I honestly don't think I'm the best choice for this"  
"Which is exactly why I picked you"  
"What?"  
"Forget it, now before I go I want to give you a little something"  
"And what would that be?"  
"I'm giving you your own powers, for 'emergency' purposes"  
"Basically that means use them however I want-"  
"Pretty much, now I'm off!"

He disappeared in a flash  
'Well that happened'

A pink earth pony with a purple and white mane and tail wearing a beanie trotted into the room  
"Um, hi" I said  
'Really? That's all you can say?'  
Her spiraling purple irises stared back at me  
"What the hay are you?" She asked  
"I don't know, you tell me"  
Her face screwed up in thought  
The draconequus came back into the living room  
"Where'd Dad go?"  
"He um, had to step out"  
"Right, well I guess that means we won't see him again for a while"  
"Does he usually disappear alot?"  
"No, but we've been separated more times than I can count"  
"That's awful"  
"Whatever, who're you?"  
"I don't really remember-"  
"You seem like a goody-two shoes, so I'll call you Accord"

"That actually has a nice ring to it, so what're your names?"  
"I'm Eris and this anklebiter is Screwball" the draconequus said

Screwball rolled her eyes and went back down the hall  
"So, a human huh?"  
"How do you know what I am?"  
"Sometimes Dad took us to Earth"  
She didn't elaborate any further, with the maddening silence I decided to try and break the ice  
"So where are we exactly?"  
"Equestria"  
"No, I mean which city- which town?"  
"Canterlot, dad set up this house so the princesses wouldn't find us"  
"Can I assume they live here too?"  
"In the castle, yeah"  
"But why so close? I think you'd risk them finding you"  
"Eh, I don't know" She replied simply "All I know is they haven't found us yet"  
"But somewhere so obvious?"  
"Haven't you heard of 'hiding in plain sight'? Besides, it's part of a space displacement spell, this house exists in the space between buildings"  
"Ah, that makes sense"  
"So tell me about yourself, not too often you see something like you around here"  
"The same thing could be said about you..."  
"You met daddy"  
"You're a teen and you still call him 'daddy'?"  
"No, sometimes I just forget to switch" She said defensively  
"Fine, I'll drop it- doesn't really matter to me anyway"  
"Right, well I'll be in my room if you need me..."  
"I thought you said you wanted to know more about me"  
"Maybe later...Oh, and one more thing"  
"What's that?"  
"Don't need me"  
She went down the hall and into her room  
"Hmmm, wonder what that was about..."

"I think she's got a crush on you" a voice sing-songed  
"Jeez Screwball don't do that! You scared the crap out of me"  
She just smiled and pretended she'd been there the whole time, or was she? I don't know

"Let me guess, you're out here now because all the problems Discord caused are gone, right?"  
"Yeah..."  
"So what you said, you really think she likes me?"  
"Oh yeah, didn't you see the way she was looking at you?"  
"How was she...looking at me?"  
"You are dense, aren't you?"

As if to drive the point home, I sank into the floor up to my knees

"Very funny, I think you're just messing with me and trying to get me in trouble with Eris"  
"Rats..."  
"Better luck next time"  
The propellor on her beanie spun and she hovered above a few feet of the floor

"You wanna see your room? I decorated it myself!"  
I swore I heard Eris give an annoyed groan from inside her room  
"Um, sure why not?"  
She led me down the hall and knocked on the wall with a hoof (which oddly enough sounded like 'shave-and-a-haircut')

The wall began to turn like a slot machine and the panels finally stopped to reveal a purple door, she pushed it open

"Well it's, uh-"  
"Do you like it? Huhhuhhuh?" she asked excitedly  
"-it's very...messy"  
"I know, right? That way everything is in its place"  
'What? Nevermind, I'll question it later...'  
"I love it Screwball, thank you"

She squealed and wrapped her hooves around my legs, then proceeded to run out of the room  
'That was actually kind of sweet...'  
"*Ahem*"

I turned around and saw Eris leaning against the doorframe  
"Hey" I said  
"Hey, um, I realized I uh, didn't really make a big deal out of you being here, and- I guess what I'm trying to say is 'welcome to the universe'" She said with a giggle  
"Thanks, it's good to be here- I think I might like living here"  
"You do realize you were brought here against your will, right?"  
"Details, details"  
"You know you're stuck here, don't you?"  
"Well, I am stuck in here with you two, so..."  
She flew over to me and punched my arm  
"Ow, what was that for?"  
"Being a jerk" she grinned  
"Right, well let me get settled in and I'll see what I can make for dinner"  
"Sure thing"  
She flew out of my room and into her own, I noticed a certain pink mare peeking through the door

"Oh she definetely has a crush on you"

I rolled my eyes and went back to inspecting my room

The walls were a yellow-green while the floor was a patchwork of colors, ranging from the colors of the rainbow and then some, a bed sat in one of the far corners of the room, in the other was a pile of random junk, I think I saw a baseball bat in there, along with a few joybuzzers among other things; Wait a minute, they have hooves- how do they swing the bat? Or throw a baseball? I put that thought into the 'question it later' stack (which was going to be as tall as Everest by the end of the month)

Sighing, I left my room and went into the kitchen

"Let's see, what have we got here?" I asked myself, opening the pantry  
"SUPRISE!"  
"AH!"  
I fell backwards onto the floor  
"Screwball, I told you not to do that!"  
"I forgot..."  
"I'll bet you did- just for that you get to help me make dinner"  
"Aw nuts!"  
"Don't give me that, you brought this upon yourself, now you have to face the consequences"  
Oh god I sound like my mother...  
"Ummm, nope!"  
And with that she left the kitchen  
"Peas, carrots, and mashed potatoes it is then"  
I pulled out the ingredients and set to work

"What's up skinny?"  
"Nothing, just making dinner"  
"Whatcha makin'?"  
"Some peas, carrots, and mashed potatoes"  
"Thank goodness" she sighed with relief  
"I take it you're happy about something?"  
"With as big a sweet tooth as Screwball has, it's rare that I get to eat something that WON'T rot my teeth" "Got it"  
"Between the two of them, Screwball and Dad could put the nearest bakery out of business"  
"I could see that happening..."  
"Yeah, I think they actually did do it a couple of times"  
I laughed as I set the potatoes and vegetables on the table, I snapped my fingers and an bull- horn appeared in my hand  
"SCREWY, DINNER'S READY!"  
"How did you do that?"  
I stared down at the bull-horn  
"I have no idea...it just sort of happened"  
"There may be hope for you yet" She said  
"Eh"  
"Jeez, what was that?" Screwball asked, coming into the kitchen

"The dinner bell, eat up" I replied  
"Oh boy! Ice cream!"

Eris and I hid a smile as Screwball put the potatoes on her plate  
"Yeah, you want some chocolate sauce with that?"  
"You bet I do!" I poured the gravy onto the potatoes and she dug in

About four bites in she coughed up all the food she had just eaten, sending a ball of mashed potatoes across the room

I couldn't hold in anymore, I burst into laughter as Eris fell out of her chair in a giggling fit

"You could have told me it wasn't ice cream!" She shouted

"It hurts! HAhahahahaHAhah, oh make it stop! Hahahaha"

"Sweet Celestia that was precious! You should have seen your face!" She said, banging her lion paw on the floor

We finally stopped and noticed Screwball glaring at both of us  
"Oh come on, it was funny!" Eris said  
"Was not"  
"You're the one who thought it was ice cream" I pointed out

She huffed and turned her vegetables into spaghetti with caramel sauce

"Alright, it was a little funny" she finally admitted

Soon we all finished and I set the dishes in the sink, letting them soak for the night  
"I'm going to bed" I yawned  
"You two be in bed by 10:00, before that just keep the noise level to a minimum"  
Eris waved her eagle claw dismissively and Screwball simply stuck her tongue out at me I went to my room and passed out onto the bed


	2. The Chaos Sisters

The chaos sisters

*Crash*  
"Gimme that!"  
"You have to catch me first!"  
"Fine! Take that!"  
"OW! No fair!"  
"Fair? I'll show you fair you little demon!"  
*Boom*

'They couldn't have waited until the afternoon to start this?' I thought as I got out of my bed  
"Let's see what the damage is this morning..."

I opened my door and followed the hallway into the living room, or what was left of it- the place was converted into a warzone, complete with barbed wire and trenches

I summoned a rubber band ball and threw it into the middle of the field, the ball exploded and when the smoke cleared Screwball and Eris were suspended from the ceiling by said rubber bands

"What? We're kinda in the middle of something here" Screwball said  
"What's all of this about?"  
"She took the last waffles!" She pointed a hoof at Eris  
"Really?" I sighed "You can use magic, why not just make more?"

Screwball's muzzle turned red from embarassment  
"I thought so, and no more fighting for the rest of the day"  
"Aw, not even a little?"  
"Don't you go have to turn the bathroom orange or something?"  
"Shoot! You're right!" she said as she left  
"Do you two always fight like that?" I asked  
"No, only over the really big stuff like waffles" Eris replied, rolling her eyes  
"Isn't it a little early for sarcasm?"  
"Nope, not at all"  
"Was that sarcasm?"  
"No"  
"Was that?"  
"N- wait a minute, you're messing with me, aren't you?"  
"Eeyup"  
"Ah, I see what you did there..."  
"Uh-huh, now I'm going to make up for some lost sleep" I said as I sat on the couch  
"You just woke up"  
"Because of you and Screwball arguing"  
"Oh, right, sorry about that"  
"It's okay, I guess I'm going to have to get used to stuff like that happening- don't kill each other, I'll be up in a little while"  
I dozed off after a few minutes

*Knock Knock Knock*  
'Huh? wha?'  
I was awoken from my nap by a loud knocking at the front door, I tried getting up but was quickly stopped when I found Eris's head laying across my form, the rest of her body was curled in on itself while her tail hung over the armrest  
"Eris, pssst, Eris wake up"  
"Hm? OH!"  
She was blushing slightly as she pushed herself off of me and the couch  
"Wh-what?"  
"Someone was knocking at the front door"  
"That's ridiculous, nopony can-"

"This is the Royal Guard, open up or we'll break the door down!"  
"How in Tatarus did they-"

*Cr-cr-cra-cra-ck-ck-ck*

She was interupted as the door was kicked in and skidded across the floor  
I grabbed her talon hand/claw and ran into the hallway,  
I went into Screwball's room and took her by a hoof  
"Hey! What's the big idea?"  
"Them" I said, indicating the guards behind us

She gulped and nodded

We went to the window at the end of the hall, shoving both of them into a well-placed cannon, I lit the fuse and hopped in myself

*Booooom!*

The three of us went hurling through the sky, over the buildings and streets of Canterlot, over some green fields and into a small town

We landed on a dark blue cloud in one of the fields outside the town  
"How did they find us?" I asked  
"I don't know- it should have been impossible for them to get to us" Eris replied  
"Looks like we're near Ponyville now"  
"An original name"  
"Tell me about it..."  
"Do you know what that was Pinkie?" a mare's voice asked  
"Nope! I just know it fell out of the sky" another answered  
"I don't know TWilight, you think we should be out here? This close to the Everfree?"  
"We'll be fine, Applejack, I doubt the monsters that live there will leave the forest borders"  
"Goodness, what in the world is that?"  
I turned and saw a group of six mares, one of which was pointing a hoof at me  
"You don't think that's Discord's work, do ya?"  
"Could you please not refer to me as 'that'? I'd prefer 'him' or 'he'"  
"What are you?"  
"I'm not a 'what' I'm a 'who', and my name is Accord"  
"Well...Accord, what are you doing out here all by yourself?"

"I'm not, I'm-"

I looked around and saw that Eris and Screwball were gone  
{We're right here}  
'Eris? Are both of you inside my head?'  
{The short answer is 'yes'}  
[It's really empty in here, this place could use some cleaning]  
'HaHa, very funny- just don't touch anything in there'  
[I make no promises!]  
I snapped back to the situation and realized the pink mare was waving a hoof in front of my eyes  
"Yoohoo Accord! You in there?"  
"Huh? Yeah, I'm fine..."  
"You look like you were in a daze, sugarcube"  
"No, I just have a lot on my mind"  
'Literally'  
"Um...are you, okay? Discord didn't...make you or, anything?" Fluttershy said  
"No, I'm just uh- new here"  
"Oh"  
"I'll um, just be going now- I've got someplace to be..."  
"Wait!" Twilight shouted  
"What?"  
"Are you the only one of your...kind?"  
"In this world, yes"  
"What do you mean 'In this world'?"  
'Crap! I revealed too much'  
"I'll just- go"

And with that I took off

"Stop him!"  
I ran as fast as I could with the six following me I felt a pair of hooves push me, which caused me to trip with said pony pinning me down  
"Let me go!"  
"Quiet you; Applejack, get some rope!"  
"Here you go!"  
"Pinkie, where did you get that?"  
"It was just laying around" she replied simply

Applejack took the rope and proceeded to bind my hands and feet, to top it off Pinkie pulled out a gag and the rainbow-maned pegasus stuck it in my mouth  
{Didn't expect you to get caught that fast-}  
[Hahahahaha, this is gold! I'll be watching the replay for days! Heeheehee]  
'Glad you two are enjoying yourselves'  
{Relax}  
'I was just bound and gagged by ponies, I don't think this is a good time to relax'  
[Didn't daddy give you your own powers?]  
'Yes, but I don't- ohhhhhhh'  
I would have face-palmed had the situation allowed it  
{Look out, we've got a genius in our midst}  
'Both of you knock it off please'  
The ropes dissolved into water and fell from my wrists and ankles, I got up and started running again  
"Oh no you don't!"  
"Get back here!"  
"So you can trap me again? No way!"  
I felt a sharp pain in my stomach and I collapsed

Poke.

"Five more minutes..."

Poke Poke

"Wake up sleepyhead"  
"Eris? What're you doing?"  
"Keeping you out of trouble, now get up, we're getting out of here"  
"I find that hard to believe"  
"Just get up..."  
I pushed myself off a bed and looked around the room  
"Where are we?" I asked  
"After TWilight used that stun-spell on you she brought you back to the library, you're in her basement now"  
"Didn't see that coming"  
I looked up to see the door opening

"Beat it! It's the fuzz!" Screwball screamed/whispered  
They both teleported out of the room as a tall pony with wings and a horn came down the stairs  
"Hey"  
"Greetings, I am Princess Celestia"  
"Hello princess, forgive me if I don't salute or anything but being bound and gagged and getting tased in the same day has taken a lot out of me"  
"Yes, you'll have to forgive Twilight, she can get a little overexcited when it comes to learning something new"  
"Thanks for the heads up, anyway, I'm Accord"  
"Hello Accord, I assume you have a number of questions"  
"How did you know I was here?"  
"My sister and I detected your presence"

'That explains how those guards found us, there's one mystery solved'  
"So let me guess, you're the one who sent those guards after us"  
"Your assumption is correct, but I wish we could have met under better circumstances"  
"Me too"  
"Now, about your 'companions'..."

'Please don't tell me she's talking about them'

"I-I- don't know who you're referring to..."  
"I think you know very well who"  
"Um, no, I don't" I lied  
"I know you're lying, now tell me"  
"I won't!"  
"You must! They're a danger to society"  
"Never!"  
"Fine, I was hoping you would comply, but since you won't, I'll have to resort to other methods"  
Her horn lit up and she and I were transported to a courtyard  
"It pains me to do this, but you leave me no choice"  
"What're you-"  
I felt myself being forced down and my wrists and neck were stuck  
"You've got to be kidding me, stocks? Really?"  
"I hope you decide to tell me what I want to hear"  
And she teleported to who-knows-where  
"Well, I'm stuck here for a while"  
"You got that right you goof, what'd you do that for?"  
"What did you think? Protecting you two"  
"Wh-why?"  
"I don't know, probably because I care?"  
Eris's face fell  
"You didn't need to do that..."  
"Yes I did, I wasn't just going to rat you out like that"  
"But-"  
"I think you two should get out of here before she comes back"

She sighed and both of them disappeared

'What have I gotten myself into?'

A number of guards had already stopped to gawk at the 'monster' in the courtyard, a few groups effectively blocking the hall in a few places  
"Would you mind not staring?" I said "I'm sure you have other duties to attend to"  
A few of them left, but most stayed where they were

"Sister, ist thou sure that was the wisest course of action?"  
"As I told him, I take no pleasure in doing this- but it was what I felt was best"  
"Discord has been detained, why do you worry?"  
"His daughters are still at large, if nothing else they are guilty by association, and only Accord knows where they are"  
"But to have him placed in the stocks?"  
"I would have interrogated him, but I desperately need to know where they are-"  
"Thou hast made a mistake, it is not the first time nor is it the last"  
"I suppose you're right, I'll have Shining Armor release him"  
"We suggest he be put under careful supervision"  
"Didn't you just tell me that he wouldn't do well in the stocks?"  
"Yes, but you would also like to see him treated like a normal prisoner, how long has it been since you have used ye old stocks?"  
Celestia blushed a little  
"Captain!"

The padlock on my stocks fell to the ground  
"What's going on?" I asked  
"We're moving you" a guard said  
"Where?"  
"A cell in the dungeons"  
'Of course'  
"Well it's better than this"  
I stood up and arched my back  
"Feels good to stand up straight again"  
"Follow us"

I trailed the guards that lead me down to a holding cell beneath the castle  
The one on the right opened the door, I obliged and entered, he closed the door I stretched out on the cot

'Sooooooo'  
{Gettin' bored there, tex?}  
'Kinda, yeah'  
[That's what you get for letting yourself get caught]  
'I'm not even going to respond to that...'  
[I think you just did]  
'That's not what I meant-'  
[I know, I just like messing with you]  
'That's an understatement'  
{This is nothing, try living with her}  
'I did'  
{Yeah, for like, a day}  
'Point taken'  
[I'm not that bad!]  
{Rrrrriiiiiiggggggghhhhhhtttttt}  
[Hmmph]  
{By the way, good luck, you're going to need it}  
'What're you-'  
One of the guards rapped on the bars with his spear  
"Get up, the princesses want to see you"  
"I can just tell how this is going to end"

"Nice to see you again, Accord"  
"Hi Celestia"  
"So thou art the human my sister has told Us about"  
"Yes, my name is Accord your highness"  
"We are Princess Luna, nice to know you"  
"Um, likewise your- highnesses?"  
"Forgive me, sometimes We- I slip into using the Royal 'We'"  
"Ah, that makes sense..."  
'Not'  
"Now that we have introductions out of the way, let's get to business"  
"I've already told you I won't tell you where they are"  
"They're a threat to national security"  
"Why are you so obsessed with catching them?"  
"I care for my subjects, I don't want them causing the same trouble Discord did"  
"As suprising as this is, they're almost nothing like Discord- sure they've got a silly streak, heck, so do I- but that's no reason to hunt them down and trying to get me to tell you where they are"  
"They are enemies of the state, and if you fail to comply, so will you"  
"That's basically blackmail, you know that right?"  
"Call it what you will, but I must know where they are"  
"I can tell you're usually a benevolent ruler, but I'll tell you this- I could have left anytime I wanted, I just wanted to try and prove to you that they're not as dangerous as you think they are, obviously I can't get my point across"  
I snapped my fingers and I teleported out of the throne room

"Why must I be so stubborn?" Celestia asked  
"'Tis his own fault he will not tell you"  
"But this could have gone better, it's as much my fault as it is his"  
"Dost thou still want to capture the daughters of chaos?"  
"At first I was detemined to get them, but after his testimony- I find myself questioning my motives. Is it true they're not as bad as I first thought them to be?"  
"We would not know, you can only make the decision that you think is best"

"So how'd it go?" Eris asked  
"Didn't you hear everything?" I said  
"Yeah, but I want to know anyway"  
"Long story short I think I may have made our situation worse"  
"How so?"  
"I kinda got mad at Celestia for wanting me to tell where you and Screwball were"  
"Did you now?"  
I rolled my eyes  
"Are you always this flippant? This is both of your futures we're talking about"  
"And yours too, by the way"  
"Guess you're right, no use worrying about what could happen"  
"'Course I am, now come on"  
"Where are we going?"  
"To pull a few pranks, you square. Where else?"  
"Do you really think that's the best thing to do right now? Given our problems?"  
"Not even one teeny tiny harmless prank?"

Don't look, don't look- curse those puppy-dog eyes

"Fine, as long as you keep it small AND it doesn't hurt anyone"  
"It's not much to work with, but I'll take it"

Meanwhile, in Ponyville, a banana cream pie explodes in Rarity's face

"There, better?"  
"Better"  
"So now what do we do?" Screwball asked  
"Let's head for Ponyville"  
"Is that a good idea? It's where the Elements of Harmony are" I said  
"Exactly, it's the last place they'll look"  
"Unless we get caught"  
"But we won't"  
"How do you-"  
"I just do, now let's go"  
She snapped her lion hand and we were outside of Ponyville  
"Where're we going to live?"  
"I've got an idea"  
I snapped my fingers and a small two-story house appeared  
"Getting used to your powers are we?"  
"Maybe..."  
"Nice digs" Screwball said, walking into the house  
"Your room is upstairs"

She buzzed up the stairs and I closed the door behind us as Eris and I walked into the living room

I sat on the couch as Eris looked around the house  
"This is pretty nice, there're worse places to live"  
"Glad you like it, I sort of based it off of the apartment in Canterlot"  
"Oh"  
"So I guess now would be a good time to ask why you were sleeping on me this morning"  
Eris turned and I saw that she was blushing heavily  
"You remember that, huh?"  
"Uh-huh"  
"Well, I was, uh, giving you a hard time!"  
"I'll take that answer since I know I won't get the real one out of you, I'm going to check on Screwball"

"Wait!"  
"What?"  
"Um, I wanted to ask you a 'hypothetical' question"  
"Uh, okay. what is it?"  
"If we were- dating"  
She blushed harder  
"-would you want, me to look like a female of your species?"  
"An interesting question...I suppose if we were in love I'd want you to be you"  
I didn't notice the confused look on her face as I climbed up the stairs

As I got closer to Screwball's room I thought I heard sniffling  
"Screwy, you okay?" I asked, pushing open the door

"I'm fine" She said in her best 'everything is normal' voice  
"Really? Doesn't sound like it"  
"J-Just leave m-me alone"  
"Hey, what's the matter?" I asked, crouching down  
"You'd just make fun of me..."  
"No I wouldn't, I think you know me a little better than that"

She mumbled something incoherent

"What?"  
She looked up with tears threatening to fall  
"I miss Daddy" She said in a soft whisper

'Why am I the one that's always in these positions?'

I picked her up and gave her a hug

"It's going to be alright"  
"N-no it won't"  
"You don't know that, I'm sure Discord will be out and about giving Celestia migraines in no time"

She buried her face in my shoulder and cried, I stood up and paced around her room until she was able to calm down

"You feeling better?" I asked  
"*Sniff* A bit"  
"Now anything else on your mind?"  
Still carrying her, I pulled back the covers on her bed and set her down, I put the covers over her  
"Will the princesses use the Elements on us?"  
I was about to answer when I saw her, those fearful eyes wanted to make _me_ to break down and cry right there  
'Not if I have anything to say about it...'  
"Just try not to think about it and get some sleep, alright?"  
"O-ok-kay"  
"Sweet dreams, Screwball"  
"G'night Accord"

I turned and went to the door, turning off her bedroom light off as I left


	3. Let's make a deal

"You have a visitor, your highnesses" Shining Armor said  
"Oh? And who might that be?" Celestia asked  
"Accord"

Both sisters cocked an eyebrow

"Very well, send him in"  
"Celestia, Luna" I said  
"Accord" They both responded  
"You must be wondering why I'm here"  
"Yes, you came all the way from Ponyville, what might that reason be?"  
"It's about Eris and Screwball"  
"What of them?"  
"After a few nights ago, I realized that things can't go on like this"  
"Oh?"  
"Yes, and I came here to reach an agreement"  
"Pray tell, what dost thou speakest of?"  
"When I tucked Screwball in a few nights ago, she was in tears because she missed her father; and because she's afraid you two are going to sic the Elements of Harmony on her and Eris"

"I do not wish to sound uncaring, but why are you telling us this?" Luna said  
"I want to show you that both of them aren't as bad as you thought they were"  
"And how do you intend to do that?"  
"Give me a month with them, two at the most- if they don't cause any problems, save for a few pranks here and there, that would prove that they're innocent and you can stop chasing them"  
"And if they do?"  
"Then I'll find somewhere to go and take them with me...and we won't be a nuisance to you any more"

"Do you realize the implications of what you have suggested?"  
"I do, and I accept the consequences of whichever way things turn out"  
Celestia and Luna whispered to each other for a short while

"Very well, we accept your bargain- if, at the end of two months time, the chaos sisters have not shown any improvement in restraining themselves, all three of you shall be judged before us"  
I looked down at the ground and nodded

"But- if they can be shown how to behave themselves- you will meet no pursuit from us"

"Thank you, you have no idea how much this means to us"  
I teleported out of the room

"Where did you run off to?" Eris asked as I warped back into our house  
"I had some business to take care of" I said simply  
"Oh yeah? And what might that be?"  
"It's a personal matter"  
"How personal?"  
"So personal that I'm not going to tell you"  
"Awww come on, please?"  
"Fine"

I snapped my fingers and she was wrapped in chains  
"What's this?"  
"Magic chains- you're going to need them in a minute"  
"What?"  
"I went to Celestia and Luna-"  
"You WHAT?"

She was already struggling in the chains

"-and I made a deal with them-"

"THAT's JUST GREAT! YOU SAID-"

"-we agreed that if you two can keep yourselves under control for two months, you two can walk around without having to worry about the Elements coming after you"

"I SHOULD- wait, what?"  
"Did you not hear what I said?"  
"Yeah...I heard it, I just don't believe it"  
"I know, isn't it great?"  
"NO, I mean how are we going to do this? We're the daughters of chaos! All that time without any fun! The horror"  
"Calm down, you're still allowed to pull a prank once in a while, besides, two months will go by like that" "But what if we can't-"  
"You will, I'm sure of it"  
"*Sigh* Fine, if it means that much to our survival..."  
I smiled as I made her chains disappear  
"Well, where should we start?" She asked  
"Let's start small, how about- we go for a walk?"  
"A walk? Really?"  
"Yes, let's bring Screwball too"  
"It's your funeral..."  
'I hope not-'

Eris growled  
"Just ignore them, that's part of why we're here" I said  
"I know...it's just kind of hard to ignore the staring"  
"Well they still remember what happened with your father, that's probably why"  
"Gee, ya think?"  
"Eeyup"  
"So tell me again why we're out here?" Screwball asked  
"To show everypony you two aren't dangerous"  
"We're not dangerous, chaos is chaos"  
"True, but you don't need to cause so much of it in one place at one time"  
"So aside from small pranks, no chaos?"  
"No chaos"  
"This is going to be a long two months..."  
"It won't be that bad"  
"Oh yes it will"  
"So what now?"  
"Why don't we sit under that tree for awhile?"  
"Can't it be something more exciting, like a candy cane?"  
"No"  
"But-"  
"Screwball- no"  
She huffed and we sat at the base of the tree  
"I guess this is pretty nice..." Eris sighed

"I'm bored, what are we supposed to do?" Screwball whined  
"Just sit and be quiet, watch stuff as it happens" I said  
"...I don't think so"  
"Congratulations, you lasted a full three seconds"  
"What's that supposed to mean?"  
"I bet I could sit here and be quiet longer"  
"Nu-uh, I'll show you who can sit still the longest, starting now!"  
Her eyes widened as she realized I'd tricked her- she opened her mouth to say something, but I put a finger to my lips  
Eris was laughing her tail off at the display

"I never wanna be that quiet again, I'll make your life miserable from now on"  
"Like you haven't already" Eris snorted  
"I'd prefer not to go through this argument again, what sould we do now?"  
"We actually get to choose?"  
"Within reason"  
"There's this great club in Las Pegasus I know..."  
"Not the worst way to spend an afternoon...sure, why not?"  
Eris snapped her claws and the three of us warped to a street in Los Pegasus

"It's crazy how much this place is similar to Earth"  
"I know, right?"  
"So where exactly is this club?"  
"Oh, not far from here"  
"By all means, lead the way then"

We walked a short ways and into an alley, the streets were clearer than I thought they'd be  
(Gee, wonder why?) we stopped and she opened a door

"Ladies first" I said  
"Who says chivalry is dead?" Screwball said, walking inside  
"Me and every mare in the city..." Eris mumbled, following her sister

I went inside and closed the door behind me  
"So what do you think? Cool place, isn't it?"  
"Actually, yeah it is"  
"Well let's take a seat"

We found a booth to sit at and waited for a few minutes  
"Can I take your- order?"  
"I'll have a root beer" Screwball said  
I cleared my throat  
"What?"  
I motioned to the waiter  
"Um, please?"  
I nodded  
"I'll just have some hay fries" Eris said  
"Make that two, please"  
"Just sit tight, I'll have your order out in a few minutes"  
"Thank you"  
"Soooooo..."  
"...this is awkward..."  
"Eeyup"  
"I think I'll- go over here for a while" Screwball said, getting up from the booth

Why you little...

"She can be a handful, can't she?" I asked  
"Oh you have no idea..."  
"Yeah-"  
"So do you think this whole 'change-for-the-better' thing will work out?"  
"I'm sure of it"  
'I think'  
"How can you be so sure?" She asked, giving me an inquisitive look  
"I've noticed you and Screwball have been fighting less"  
"Only because we've been a little preoccupied with all this"  
"One step at a time"

"Here are your orders, that'll be five bits"  
I pulled the gold coins out of my pocket and dropped them on his tray  
"Interesting...so you give money for the things you take" Eris said as Screwball sat back down at the booth  
"Yes, that's the way normal people do things" I said, rolling my eyes  
"We're not people"  
"You know what I mean..." I groaned  
Screwball quickly gulped down her soda and started munching on the bottle

"What's it taste like?"  
"Bubblegum"  
"Ah"  
Eris and I finished our fries and we left the club  
"So what now?"  
"Why don't we go back to Ponyville? It's getting a little late"  
"Ugh, fine- party pooper"

We disappeared in a flash and reappeared in Ponyville  
"See? That wasn't so bad, was it?"  
"I guess not-" Screwball admitted  
"Eh, could have gone worse..."  
"Well why don't we go see if Twilight needs any help at the library?"  
"What? Where did that come from?"  
"Libraries are boring! I don't wanna go"  
"It's either that or go home and go straight to bed"  
"Says you"  
"Says I, now which is it?"

"I'll give the library a shot- who knows? We might find something interesting there"  
"Fine, I'll go- but I won't have any fun"  
"I'm sure you won't, now come on, the library's right there"  
We crossed the short distance from the street to the library door  
"Hey, welc- TWILIGHT!"  
"What Spike?" She asked, walking down the stairs  
He dove behind her and pointed to us  
"Oh, it's you" Twilight said, giving us glares  
"What's up Sparkly?"  
"My name is Twilight"  
"And my name is Eris, what's your point?"  
Twilight huffed and went towards the stairs  
"It's okay Spike, they're 'harmless'"

'Celestia have mercy on our souls'


	4. Ouch

"Come on Eris, let's not bother Twilight anymore than we need to" I said, gently pulling on her tail  
"Pffft, it's not my fault she can't take a joke" She whined, pulling her tail out of my grasp  
"I don't think flooding her basement with chocolate milk counts as a joke"  
"I cleaned it up right after, jeez"  
"Yeah, with a hockey puck and a paint roller"  
"You know what?" She snapped "I've had it up to here with you and your- no, nevermind"  
"Are you alright?" I asked  
"Yeah...I'm just perfect...let's go back home"

Eris, Screwball, and I walked back to our house- once Screwball was in her room, I went up to Eris's

"Hey" I said, knocking on the door  
"What"  
"Are you okay? You sounded pretty ticked out there"  
"I don't want to talk about it..."  
"I'm sure you'll want to eventually, might as well get it out now"  
"No..."  
"Do you at least want to-"

"Shut up! I don't want to talk about it! Don't you understand? Go away!"

Her outburst took me by suprise, and figured she'd come to me when she was ready, so I left her room and sat on the couch

"I heard shouting, is everything okay?" Screwball asked, coming down the stairs  
"As okay as it'll get in this house...yeah, I was just talking to Eris"  
"Did you ask her out?"  
I sighed and leaned back on the couch  
"Your eyes might fall out of your head if you keep rolling them like that"  
"Screwy, this is serious, I think Eris is taking this harder than she's letting on"  
"Oh really?"  
"Screwball" I warned  
"Fine" She moaned "What's up?"  
"Do you know anything that might cheer her up?"

She opened her mouth

"-and don't you dare say 'chaos'"

She closed it

"Well...there is one thing..." She said with a grin  
"I dare to ask- what is it?"  
"Go ask her out"  
"Why are you so set on getting us together?"  
"Maybe it's because I care for my sister"  
"Really? Well that's really swee-"  
"-or maybe I want to wreak a little havoc"  
I groaned and got off the couch  
"I'm sorry! I'm sorry! Please don't go!" she cried, pulling my pants leg

I stopped as soon as I reached the stairs  
Sighing, I turned and knelt down to Screwball's level  
"Do you really think I'd leave you two?" I asked softly  
She bit her lip  
"We've had a few...foster families before..." she said  
"That's right, you two were on your own for a while there"  
"Yeah...anyway- those ponies didn't really love us, they were just too afraid of what we might do to them..."  
"I can only imagine what that feels like-"  
"-but we were only havin' fun! Honest! We never hurt anyone! Ask Daddy or Eris!"  
"I know...I believe you" I said, picking her up  
"Y-you do?"  
"You've never given me a reason to doubt either of you, so yes, I believe you"  
She wrapped her hooves around my neck and I heard her sniffle  
"So...do you know what you want to do now?" I asked  
"I think, you could ask her out"  
'Not this again'  
"Just hear me out- she really does like you, it wouldn't be the worst thing in the world for you to help her out"  
"*Sigh* I'll go ask her, but I doubt this'll be enough to get her through whatever it is she's going through"

I walked up the stairs and hesitantly knocked on Eris's door

"Go away!" She shouted  
"Eris, you don't have to talk, I just want to ask you something"  
"No!"

Against my better judgement, I pushed the door open.

As soon as I did, I felt something collide with my head

X

"Accord?" I asked "Accord, come on"

No response

"Accord, get up!" I shouted "Quit fooling around!"

He didn't move

"Accord, this isn't funny! I mean it!"

I floated towards him and shook him

"Get up! Get up!"

"What are you shouting for?" Screwball asked, peeking in "*Gasp* You killed Accord!"  
"N-no, I didn't, he's still breathing!"  
"We need to get him to the hospital!"  
"I know! I know!"

I grabbed Accord's limp hand, took Screwball by the hoof teleported out of the house

X

"I need a doctor! He's hurt!" I shouted as we materialized in the waiting room

Two doctors and a nurse burst out of the hospital with a gurney  
They lifted him onto the gurney and carried him back to chaos-knows-where

A nurse trotted up to us  
"I-I-I need y-you to f-fill out th-these forms p-please"  
I grabbed the clipboard in her mouth and wrote on it with my claw

Name- "Accord"  
Date of Birth- "Unknown"  
'Have to ask him about that later'  
Occupation- "None"

I continued filling out the forms and handed them back to the nurse

After hours of waiting, Twilight and her friends trotted into the waiting room, with their elements on of all things (what a big suprise)

"Eris, what did you do?"  
"I did something really, really stupid Twilight"  
"Really, really, _really_ stupid" Screwball interuppted  
"What did you do?" She asked again  
"I-I- was mad at- at Accord and- and- I hit him! I hit him wi-with a sn-snowglobe!" I said, burying my face in my hands

None of them said anything, even Screwball was silent

"I'm- I'm such an *hic* idiot, I should have just- just talked to him"  
I was in tears by now, I may not have realized it before, but Accord had really grown on me and darn it, I wasn't about to lose him now.

I felt someone wrap their hooves around my arms and held tight  
I looked up from my palms and saw that someone was Screwball  
"He's going to be okay, sis, he's come out of worse dealing with us"  
"Th-thanks" I said, hugging her back

I stood up and little miss magic and her friends were all bewildered  
"What? You've never seen siblings have a moment?"

Twilight and the others looked to each other, then back at us  
"I guess you really have changed; not a whole lot, but it's there"  
"Th-thank you...Twilight"

"I still don't trust either of you!" Rainbow-mane said  
"I wouldn't expect anything less, you're the Element of Loyalty"  
"You just watch your step!"

I just sighed

"You just think it's easy, don't you? To change, just like that? Don't you think we want to be able to go out and have a little fun without everone running in fear? That we actually like to be ignored and hated? You know, I actually wanted to hang out with you- I thought you all were as nice as everyone says you are. Us? Oh, we're evil just because of who Dad is- and we want to change- we really do- but do you see how much we've tried to change? No! You just keep harping on the fact that we're different! Well live with it! I may be trying to learn all about harmony and everything, but that won't stop me from giving you a good slap upside the head- and if you still think I don't care about anyone but myself, I am proud to say I'm good friends with Accord, who's probably in surgery by now, you can just freeze us right now and save yourselves the trouble of doing it later"

Rainbow-mane's jaw was on the floor  
Everyone was silent, until Sparkly spoke up

"Eris...we're so sorry, we had no idea-"  
"Stop it- just, save it, I'm going to check on Accord"

I floated towards the nurse's window, Screwball following

X

Screwball and I sat in Accord's hospital room, watching him while he was recovering from the treatment the hospital staff had given him.

'Celestia, if you can hear me, please, please, please, just let Accord pull through this- I know I don't deserve to ask anything of you- but, I just don't know any more...'

I looked to Screwball, sleeping on Accord's chest

'...let him pull through? Please?'

**A/N: Hope you enjoyed the chapter, don't forget to R&R, and please check out my other stories if you want to.**


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